Yup, our economy is in the toilet and everyone’s demanding a bailout. However, the only one you need to worry about is ME. I mean, sure, I’m doing quite well financially and you’re probably struggling, but the strong take from the weak. That’s just how things work. Hell, it’s that much more fun to take your money now, knowing how much it could help you out in these hard times.

I’m looking for sad, pathetic losers to be my bailout bitches, to send me money to make me even more comfortable, just like all those banking execs getting their fat bonuses. While you’re already struggling to make ends meet, you should have to struggle even more. Cancel your cable, stop smoking/drinking, quit your website subscriptions. ALL of that money should be going to ME. I’m the one who deserves luxury while you deserve to eat ramen noodles while watching whatever it is that losers watch on basic cable.

Send gift certificates to princessdextra@gmail.com and find me on Yahoo under the name spoileddextra. But if you plan on PMing me, you’d damn well better send tribute to my e-mail address first.